The term “approach anxiety” is well known in the pickup artist community. Approach anxiety is basically an emotional response such as fight or flight whereby you see an attractive woman that you would like to approach and talk to, yet your body experiences a sensation which is fear or social phobia. Some people have said this does not really exist as it’s all in the mind. Well if that’s the case then I strongly disagree as does the body not follow the mind of course it does simple science tells us that. Whether you experience social anxiety, situational anxiety, approach anxiety, these are all the same symptom which is fear.
Before I proceed to explore this condition I’m not even going to say I have the cure nor do I know anyone who claims to do so. Approach anxiety is definitely something one can reduce through further understanding and practical reputation. I don’t think there is a living being that does not experience some form or fear/anxiety at any given stage in their life. I’m always very sceptical when I hear people preaching that anxiety does not exist and they are enlightened and love everything in the universe which sounds fantastic in theory but lacks any real world truth.
I find people who preach this kind of new age hippy tree hugging spiel are usually more fearful than anyone else. I’m all for creating a better world and bringing people together, however at this time I’m more interested in finding the truth and not what I want to be true which is what people tend to hope for. Fear/anxiety is very much part of the human condition and a very important one if I may add. Without fear, there would be not be any groundbreaking inventions as every great inventor that has created anything of value to the world would have experienced fear beforehand. I’m interested in learning
how we as men can manage our fear and drive it towards a more positive and creative use. Fear is an emotion and one that we can learn to communicate with and not be afraid of or try to destroy, which is what some pickup coaches will claim which I again disagree and question such bold claims.I have been coaching for over 3 years I have seen men go from shy, introverted, fearful, anxious to really outgoing and confident which is so lovely to see.
This transformation has not come about from reading books and intellectualising theory on crushing fear this comes from taking practical action – which Is a term I feel now is being thrown around to easily in the dating and personal development world but oh well some people talk the talk and others walk the walk. I spent many years approaching women on the street overcoming my ‘approach anxiety” getting phone numbers,dates and lots of hot sex with really attractive women. Now if I was to tell you that I now don’t experience any anxiety that would not be true.
I have learned to manage my anxiety to a point that yes at times it feels non-existent and other times it can revisit me however I have the mental strength to handle it and still do the things I want to do in the world such as chat a hot bird up get her number take her on a romantic date and give her a romantic time in the bedroom.
I have demonstrated through my YouTube video demonstrations on how to overcome anxiety by doing simple practical drills such as walking up to 10 women and giving them a genuine compliment that wishing them a good day. This is a great way to get into a positive state and gradually get more relaxed socially and of course build more courage which of course leads to more solid results with women and a more happy healthier social life. Lastly I want to add that approach anxiety is not something men should be ashamed of rather one should be intrigued to get a deeper understanding of this symptom and learn to surrender to this emotional as Geoff Thompson would say “surrender to the fear, marinate in the fear, drive the fear use it to positive effect”.
Your friend and coach