How many times have you been walking down the street and seen a girl you find really attractive yet you do not even attempt to talk to her? You end up going home that same day, regretting the missed opportunity and beating yourself up over it. As someone who has lived this reality in the past, I know how frustrating this is and the truth is the average man sucks when it comes to talking to women.
The fact is most men simply have no idea how to communicate with a woman on a sexual level. They think that attracting a woman is about being really nice and playing it safe. Women are not at all into this type of approach as they want a strong confident honest man which may sound like allot but believe, me once you have enough practice you realise it’s really straightforward.
Women are not bitchy or out to get men; most of them are really genuine they just want to connect with a genuine man. Now I’m not being a white knight and saying that there are no bad women out there. Just like all people you have good and bad. However its in your hands to go out into the world and attract the type of woman you desire. I find that most men who lack confidence with women suffer from social anxiety or some past trauma that has affected their confidence. I used to suffer from massive social anxiety due to several traumatic experiences such as being bullied at school and just being naturally introverted along with some negative experiences with women that held me back.
Like most young men I was brought up with the whole just be a gentleman, be nice and you will meet the right one. This really confused me as all the girls I had encountered with this approach simply turned me down and all the confident sexual men were successful. I got to a point where I thought “Ok I will just be an asshole then if that’s what women want”. To my surprise this did not work either! I was really confused, what could I do that is simple to get a woman?
With more practice and personal development I started to see a common pattern that when I was simply not trying to hard just enjoying myself and being more flirtatious, women tended to be more attracted to me. This gave me more confidence and a strong determination to get this part of my life handled which I later realised that my social anxiety had affected every area of my life not just women although that was by far the most important on the list.
I believe that every man on this earth has the capabilities to be successful with women if he is willing to face his insecurities, work on himself and become the best version of himself. Sadly, most men are too lazy to take action and get out and start talking to women as their fears, anxieties and insecurities keep them trapped in a complacent reality that is unhappy for them yet comfortable.
NO amount of theory can give you the understanding, confidence and congruence you need to meet and attract women. You have to go out and practice which is why I have shown tons of infield video demonstrations on YouTube of meet picking up women on the street. You can only learn so much by watching YouTube videos, you need to experience talking to women yourself which is ultimately what will build your confidence.
Lastly I want to leave you with this message that will inspire you to take action and challenge your limiting beliefs that is stopping you from meeting women. What you think you know with women or how you view yourself is not actually true. You can change everything, it’s all perception how you see the world through your own eyes is what your getting back. As you can see in my videos’s I walk up to random girls and start kissing them after a 5 minute conversation. I take them straight from the street to the coffee shops, bars and sometimes I even take them straight home! Even with my level of experience, I still get rejected by women which is completely fine as I enjoy the process and continue to challenge the social norms whilst remaining a respectful gentleman. As long as you are being honest, women are very likely to respond positively towards you.
“We have to come out of our comfort zone to get real comfort”
Your friend and coach,
Johnny Berba